How are ya darlin'? Will Miss Cleo be the next "physicist" on the Dodgers' payroll? Call 'meh noowww to find ooout.

McCarver: Well along the comical lines, the Dodgers did have enough money to hire a physicist who was hired to send positive energy waves to the Dodgers, his name was Vladimir Shpunt.  He was a Russian physicist.  I mean, to my knowledge, no major league team has ever hired anybody along those lines.

Buck: And Vladimir is considered one of the top three Russian physicist healers who specializes in beaming positive energy from his home in Massachussettes to a team in Major League Baseball.

McCarver: And the funny thing, he’s only been to Dodger Stadium one time, the other games he watches on television.

Buck: But did anybody know he was there?

McCarver: Well he could be sending positive energy waves right now as we speak on our telecast!

Buck: Which brings up a good point, if youre willing to hire him once for the positive energy vibes, shouldn’t that be like a lifetime deal?  Do you ever want to say “Hey this isn’t working out Vladimir, we can’t afford to bring you back” and now youre dealing with a Russian physicist healer who’s thinking negative energy vibes?

McCarver: That’s right he could…you’d see the flip side of it with the negative energy vibes, that’s right. Haven’t thought of it like that.

Buck: I don’t think you want to play with something like that.

McCarver: No you’d have to keep him on the payroll forever.

Buck: No truth to the rumor that he could make Tommy Lasorda levitate…from his home in new England.
[Adrian Beltre single]

Buck: Vladimir Shpunt was part of the Dodger payroll from 2004 – 2008.

*I should note that neither McCarver nor Buck were taking the story seriously, and they were having a laugh about it.  However, the story makes more sense to me if you substitute “psychic” for “physicist,” as the existence of “positive energy waves” was not covered in any physics course that I’ve ever taken.  Don’t know if Mr. Shpunt actually bills himself as a physicist, or if McCarver and Buck were just a bit confused over the reality of physics.

Until then, enjoy this nerd card, straight from the “what were they thinking?” file…

Tim McCarver’s instant reaction:

And we’ll never know the answer to this, but you have to ask yourself the question: was that the most satisfying home run he ever hit?  Maybe…

And McCarver just doesn’t quit…while I was typing this post, David Ortiz took a strike on a very slow curveball, leading to the following exchange:

Joe Buck: Ortiz trying not to smile after this lollipop dropped in for strike one.
Tim McCarver: Reminded me of that song, “Lollipop, lollipop…Oh lolli-lollipop…From the late ’50s.
JB: Here’s a 2-1 pitch grounded foul outside of first.
TM: Don’t ask me the group who sang it but…(trails off)*

* From Wikipedia:”Lollipop” is a pop song written by Julius Dixson and Beverly Ross in 1958 for the duo Ronald and Ruby, which was covered most successfully by The Chordettes.

The run on Vorpy’s ’92 Score set continues…What struck me when I saw Mr. Briley’s eye-wear for the first time was their similarity to Jon Lajoie’s “Rapist Glasses.”  Mr. Briley is now a minor-league hitting coach in the Chicago White Sox organization.

When I posted the Matt Young card last month, I challenged anyone to show me a card more deserving of the “distorted faces” tag.  Well Vorpy has responded, and responded with great force, by sending me this Tim Leary card.  While Mr. Leary gets a small pass in my book due to his pose being mid-pitch, this is an awfully strong entry in the “distorted faces” camp.

Not to be confused with the psychedelic drug advocate, this Tim Leary played in the major leagues for 13 seasons.  He finished his career with almost 1500 innings pitched, an ERA+ of 90, a World Series ring, and the 1988 “Comeback Player of the Year” award.

I hope Mr. O’Brien is catching a pick-off attempt in this picture, because if not, the Score company has captured the first “stretch” in baseball history that fails to clear the edge of the base from which the stretch originates.

Mr. O’Brien appears to have been a very good defensive first baseman, and even hit more than 20 HRs a couple times in the mid 1980′s.

I was pretty sure I had seen this guy playing “class nerd #2″ in at least four different ’80s comedies. It turns out he had a ten-year career in MLB, and even made an All-Star team.

Sorry for the sporadic posts lately…June is a busy time over here at Nerd Central.

Another top-notch effort from the 1982 Fleer set.  Was this picture taken on a Little League field?

My favorite quiz was baseball related (of course). Can you name the five pitchers with the most starts for each MLB team from 2000 to 2009? I got 86 out of 150, with minimal cheating. I dare my fellow nerds to beat that score. You try naming the 5 guys who made the most starts for Tampa or Washington since 2000.

EDIT: Might help if I actually included the link. http://www.sporcle.com/games/stanvick/starting_pitchers_00s

Someone get the Elias Sports Bureau on the phone.