Anyone who grew up collecting baseball cards in the late 1980s and early 1990s is intimately familiar with Beckett Baseball Card Monthly. I was a subscriber for several years and eagerly awaited the arrival of each issue, so that I could check out which player was featured on the front and back covers, as well as the soaring value of my stack of 1989 Upper Deck Jerome Walton rookie cards. My other favorite thing about Beckett was the “Funny Cards” section, in which readers would send in baseball cards that they had altered for humorous effect.

Inspired by the creativity of other Beckett readers, I produced my own “funny” cards, which my ten-year-old sense of humor thought were pretty damned clever. They weren’t. In fact, looking at my efforts nearly two decades later is pretty embarrassing. Nevertheless, I will periodically feature some of my “funny” cards on Nerd Baseball. The first masterwork, Steve Trout, is displayed below. I apologize in advance for the douche chills.

I probably would have made a Steve Sax "funny" card as well, but I didn't know how to draw a saxophone.